Moments

This sweet girl faces a mountain of challenges sometimes I wonder how she does it. She is eight and has more wisdom than I do and I am 30.

This year has been a difficult one for her. School has become a huge challenge. At the end of last year I could tell she was having some issues processing information she was learning, I could see her lack of comprehension as she was reading and could tell something was up. We went to see a neuropshycologist and after some intense testing he had some answers. We found out she had some processing disorders, the damage in her brain that had caused the Cerebral Palsy was also causing her some difficulty when it came to comprehending complex concepts, he said she tested at grade level but he is not sure how because she had so many issues with learning he could tell that from her determination and a lot of help at home she was succeeding even though she shouldn't be. He told us the upcoming years would be super difficult though if we didn't get her some help at school because the concepts become so complex as you get in 4th, 5th, 6th grade etc. I could already tell she was starting to struggle a lot at school and we were spending hours at night on homework. So for the past few months I have been working with the school to get her some help, it has been difficult, she has struggled in school the past couple months. After the neuropsych. eval. a bunch of different therapies were suggested so I have tried to get her into as much as I can to get her as much help as possible, so between school, therapy, and homework she has a lot to do not to mention she is in a choir and does activities every other week for church. I will admit it has been challenging.

A Month or so ago our stake president announced that Elder M. Russell Ballard was coming to our Stake conference and he challenged us to read the Book of Mormon everyday to prepare for him coming, and to get inspiration for things we need. I have to admit I haven't been perfect but I have tried to read daily, some nights just reading one line as I fall asleep, or remembering the next day that I hadn't read, and reminding myself I need to. Even though I haven't been perfect at it, it has been on my mind a lot. One night in particular It had been a long evening for Kambree and I we had ran to speech therapy, after she jumped in the car I immediately started practicing spelling words with her and she looked up at me and said "mom I never get to play" my heart broke and she was right she rarely especially during the week ever gets to play, even in the car I have her reading, or doing homework just to keep up. Then when we got home Kyle told me about a kid on the bus who told him his sister was weird I loved his response "no she's not she is just right" Love that kid, he really is courageous. Then he told me there was a kid that told one of his friends that she didn't like Kambree and that some of the kids don't like to sit by her on the bus. My heart was just aching for her. After we got home from therapy that night, studied spelling words, got her homework done, her stretched and a bath taken I think she was happy to just fall into bed. I was just thinking about her and all she has to go through not only physical, and mental, but mean kids too and My heart was just breaking for her. I was crying some just thinking about my sweet girl and everything she has to endure and I remembered I hadn't read in my scriptures that day so I got my phone and began reading the sweetest verses, words I needed right at that moment. I just happened to be reading in 1Nephi 18 and came upon verse 2 and 3.

2 Now I, Nephi, did not work the timbers after the manner which was learned by men, neither did I build the ship after the manner of men; but I did build it after the manner which the Lord had shown unto me; wherefore, it was not after the manner of men.

3 And I, Nephi, did go into the mount oft, and I did ^apray oft unto the Lord; wherefore the Lord ^bshowed unto me ^cgreat things.

I was reminded to pray often so I did that night, about my sweet girl and then went to bed, the next day I remembered the sweet feeling I felt as I read those verses so I went back and read them again, they hit me so strongly that morning, they were the exact words I needed and brought so much peace. Now you may wonder why this could relate so much to my situation as Nephi was building a ship and I am a mother raising children, to be honest I have read these verses so many times and I had never drawn this comparison but on that day Heavenly Father wanted me to know that this was HIS girl and that he is very aware of her and that Joe and I are not raising her after the manner of men we are raising her after the manner of God. We are building a ship so to speak (a sweet child 6 of them in fact) and we are not building them up after the manner of men we are building them up after the manner of God. Nephi asks God after he is commanded to build a ship, a ship he has no idea how to build, where do I go that I might find ore to make tools so I can build this ship. Well I must ask where do I go so that I can find the best tools to raise (build) these children after the manner of the Lord. It then goes on to say that Nephi prayed often and the Lord showed him great things. I am confident if I pray often the Lord will show me exactly what I need to do to raise Kambree and all my children after the manner of him. It brings tears to my eyes to think about it again it was such a sweet spiritual experience that has changed me for the better. I am so grateful for these teaching moments. I am so grateful for Nephi and he is one of my Hero's. The Book of Mormon is true I have a living testimony of that.

It is difficult watching your children go through hard things but I will tell you Kambree wears an armor daily, one God has given her to protect her special spirit, and because things are hard she and I, our whole family has grown so so much. Last night I was driving home and I thought, it would be nice if things were easy... and then I stopped to think, all the times I have learned so much in my life is when things are hard, I grew daily as Kayelee was in the hospital and it was one of the hardest things I have ever gone through. Kambree goes through hard things daily strength, wisdom and learning has come when things are hard not easy. One thing I know too is that God doesn't leave us alone ever, he loves us so much and when things are exceptionally hard he is always there.